Numbah Nine day of Christmas, my tutu give to me Nine pound of poi, eight ukulele, seven shrimp a-swimmin', Seex hula lesson, five beeg fat peeg, foah flowah let, tree dry squid, two coconut, An' one mynah bird in one papaya tree.
Numbah Ten day of Christmas, my tutu give to me Ten can of beer, nine pound of poi, eight ukuklele, seven shrimp a-swimmin' Seex hula lesson, five beeg fat peeg, Foah flowah lei, tree dry squid, two coconut, An' one mynah bird in one papaya tree.
Numbah Eleven day of Christmas, my tutu give to me Eleven missionary, ten can of beer, nine pound of poi, Eight ukulele, seven shrimp a-swimmin', seex hula lesson, Five beeg fat peeg, foah flowah lei, tree dry squid, two coconut, An' one mynah bird in one papaya tree.
(Numbah Twelve day of Christmas the bes', and the bes' stuff always come las'...)
Numbah Twelve day of Christmas, my tutu give to me Twelve TELEVISION, eleven missionary, ten can of beer, Nine pound of poi, eight ukulele, seven shrimp a-swimmin', Seex hula lesson, FORTY steenkin' peeg, Foah flowah lei, tree dry squid, two coconut, An' one mynah bird in one papaya tree!
Music and lyrics published by Hawaiian Recording and Publishing Company, Inc., and copyrighted in 1959.
Friday, December 14, 2007
12 Days of Christmas - Hawaiian Style
Christmas Humor: "Numbah One day of Christmas, my tutu give to me One mynah bird in one papaya tree.
Numbah Two day of Christmas, my tutu give to me Two coconut, an' one mynah bird in one papaya tree.
Numbah Tree day of Christmas, my tutu give to me Tree dry squid, two coconut, An' one mynah bird in one papaya tree.
Numbah Foah day of Christmas, my tutu give to me Foah flowah lei, tree dry squid, two coconut, An' one mynah bird in one papaya tree.
Numbah Five day of Christmas, my tutu give to me Five beeg fat peeg... foah flowah lei, tree dry squid, two coconut, An' one mynah bird in one papaya tree.
Numbah Seex day of Christmas, my tutu give to me Seex hula lesson, five beeg fat peeg (that make TEN!), Foah flowah lei, tree dry squid, two coconut, An' one mynah bird in one papaya tree.
Numbah Seven day of Christmas, my tutu give to me Seven shrimp a-swimmin', seex hula lesson, Five beeg fat peeg, foah flowah lei, tree dry squid, two coconut, An' one mynah bird in one papaya tree.
Numbah Eight day of Christmas, my tutu give to me Eight ukulele, seven shrimp a-swimmin', seex hula lesson, Five beeg fat peeg (that make TWENNY!), foah flowah lei, tree dry squid, two coconut, An' one mynah bird in one papaya tree.
Numbah Two day of Christmas, my tutu give to me Two coconut, an' one mynah bird in one papaya tree.
Numbah Tree day of Christmas, my tutu give to me Tree dry squid, two coconut, An' one mynah bird in one papaya tree.
Numbah Foah day of Christmas, my tutu give to me Foah flowah lei, tree dry squid, two coconut, An' one mynah bird in one papaya tree.
Numbah Five day of Christmas, my tutu give to me Five beeg fat peeg... foah flowah lei, tree dry squid, two coconut, An' one mynah bird in one papaya tree.
Numbah Seex day of Christmas, my tutu give to me Seex hula lesson, five beeg fat peeg (that make TEN!), Foah flowah lei, tree dry squid, two coconut, An' one mynah bird in one papaya tree.
Numbah Seven day of Christmas, my tutu give to me Seven shrimp a-swimmin', seex hula lesson, Five beeg fat peeg, foah flowah lei, tree dry squid, two coconut, An' one mynah bird in one papaya tree.
Numbah Eight day of Christmas, my tutu give to me Eight ukulele, seven shrimp a-swimmin', seex hula lesson, Five beeg fat peeg (that make TWENNY!), foah flowah lei, tree dry squid, two coconut, An' one mynah bird in one papaya tree.
On the eleventh day of Christmas, my kitten ate for me.....
On the eleventh day of Christmas, my kitten ate for me.....
The drumsticks off my 19-pound turkey. OK,OK, So this one time it
was my fault. I knew I never should have uttered those now
infamous words: "Your first turkey, Sara. Want to try just a
little piece?" Cost: Christmas Dinner.
On the twelfth day of Christmas........
Sara rested. And so, thank goodness, did my VISA card.
The drumsticks off my 19-pound turkey. OK,OK, So this one time it
was my fault. I knew I never should have uttered those now
infamous words: "Your first turkey, Sara. Want to try just a
little piece?" Cost: Christmas Dinner.
On the twelfth day of Christmas........
Sara rested. And so, thank goodness, did my VISA card.
On the eighth day of Christmas, my kitten helped me...
On the eighth day of Christmas, my kitten helped me...
Replace my E and G guitar strings. Would you believe a kitten
could fit into the itty-bitty hole in the middle of my Yamaha
guitar? Neither could I, but Sara thought so. And she succeeded
once she got those rascally strings out of the way.
Unfortunately, her little rear end couldn't get out the way I
came in. After paying through the whiskers for her previous
escapades, I would have been willing to leave her in the guitar
for the duration of the holiday season, except that she chose to
get stuck two hours before I was due at the nursing home for our
annual Christmas carol sing-a-long. Set of steel guitar strings:
$12.95; jar of petroleum jelly: 79 cents.
On the ninth day of Christmas, my kitten destroyed for me...
My Christmas card list when she walked across my computer's
delete key. Cost for call to Computer Country's 900/help line:
$17.50. And I still don't know what happened to the listings of B
through H.
On the tenth day of Christmas, my kitten hid from me.....
The remote control from my 13-inch TV. This wouldn't be such a
disaster if she hadn't previously stolen the power knob. I missed
a week's worth of Christmas specials, including my all-time
favorite, "It's a Wonderful Life." Rental of "It's a Wonderful
Life": $2; purchase of book, "Good owners, great cats": $24.95.
Unfortunately, it never mentions the psychological profile of
kittens with kleptomania.
Replace my E and G guitar strings. Would you believe a kitten
could fit into the itty-bitty hole in the middle of my Yamaha
guitar? Neither could I, but Sara thought so. And she succeeded
once she got those rascally strings out of the way.
Unfortunately, her little rear end couldn't get out the way I
came in. After paying through the whiskers for her previous
escapades, I would have been willing to leave her in the guitar
for the duration of the holiday season, except that she chose to
get stuck two hours before I was due at the nursing home for our
annual Christmas carol sing-a-long. Set of steel guitar strings:
$12.95; jar of petroleum jelly: 79 cents.
On the ninth day of Christmas, my kitten destroyed for me...
My Christmas card list when she walked across my computer's
delete key. Cost for call to Computer Country's 900/help line:
$17.50. And I still don't know what happened to the listings of B
through H.
On the tenth day of Christmas, my kitten hid from me.....
The remote control from my 13-inch TV. This wouldn't be such a
disaster if she hadn't previously stolen the power knob. I missed
a week's worth of Christmas specials, including my all-time
favorite, "It's a Wonderful Life." Rental of "It's a Wonderful
Life": $2; purchase of book, "Good owners, great cats": $24.95.
Unfortunately, it never mentions the psychological profile of
kittens with kleptomania.
On the sixth day of Christmas, my kitten opened for me...
On the sixth day of Christmas, my kitten opened for me...
The presents beneath my Christmas tree. It was only two, really.
While doing some early shopping at a discount store, I purchased
a catnip mouse for Sara's stocking. Apparently, anything in the
same bag as catnip takes on its potent aroma for a very long
time. Replacement costs: $3.99 for another roll of Christmas
wrapping paper, $4.50 for two empty boxes, $1 each for the kind
of bows Sara can't unravel.
On the seventh day of Christmas, my kitten lost for me...
The earrings I bought for my sister Mary. Actually, it was one
earring but since Mary doesn't have a hole in her nose or navel,
a pair of matching earrings does make a more appealing gift. Sale
price: $29.95 plus tax.
The presents beneath my Christmas tree. It was only two, really.
While doing some early shopping at a discount store, I purchased
a catnip mouse for Sara's stocking. Apparently, anything in the
same bag as catnip takes on its potent aroma for a very long
time. Replacement costs: $3.99 for another roll of Christmas
wrapping paper, $4.50 for two empty boxes, $1 each for the kind
of bows Sara can't unravel.
On the seventh day of Christmas, my kitten lost for me...
The earrings I bought for my sister Mary. Actually, it was one
earring but since Mary doesn't have a hole in her nose or navel,
a pair of matching earrings does make a more appealing gift. Sale
price: $29.95 plus tax.
On the third day of Christmas, my kitten wrecked for me...
On the third day of Christmas, my kitten wrecked for me...
13 ornaments on my Christmas tree. My mistake was forgetting to
chain the decorations to the branches. My other error was leaving
the room to go to the bathroom while Sara feigned sleeping under
the tree. How was I to know the kitten was actually measuring its
climbing potential? Value of broken bulbs? 7.50 plus tax.
On the fourth day of Christmas, my kitten broke for me...
A statue in my Lenox Nativity. Would you believe two Wise men
plus a head? Lenox nativity figurines: $55.99
On the fifth day of Christmas, my kitten scratched for me...
The kid across the street who collects for charity. It was an
accident. She merely wanted to reach out and touch someone.
Unfortunately, she used a unsheathed claw to do so. I settled
out-of-court for the cost of a jacket to replace the boy's blood
stained one and a hefty donation to the charity of their choice.
Although the amount must remain secret according to our
settlement, let me put it this way. You haven't seen many
soldiers for the Salvation Army this year, have you? Think: Major
Windfall!
13 ornaments on my Christmas tree. My mistake was forgetting to
chain the decorations to the branches. My other error was leaving
the room to go to the bathroom while Sara feigned sleeping under
the tree. How was I to know the kitten was actually measuring its
climbing potential? Value of broken bulbs? 7.50 plus tax.
On the fourth day of Christmas, my kitten broke for me...
A statue in my Lenox Nativity. Would you believe two Wise men
plus a head? Lenox nativity figurines: $55.99
On the fifth day of Christmas, my kitten scratched for me...
The kid across the street who collects for charity. It was an
accident. She merely wanted to reach out and touch someone.
Unfortunately, she used a unsheathed claw to do so. I settled
out-of-court for the cost of a jacket to replace the boy's blood
stained one and a hefty donation to the charity of their choice.
Although the amount must remain secret according to our
settlement, let me put it this way. You haven't seen many
soldiers for the Salvation Army this year, have you? Think: Major
Windfall!
A Kitten's 12 Days of Christmas Mischief
The next few posts will contain the whole thing:
On the first day of Christmas, my kitten ruined for me...
A batch of my special hand-print cookies. I had turned my back to
grab the cookie sheet sitting on the stove. In that micro-second,
Sara climbed onto the table, poked her paw into the delightfully
kneady mixture and, suddenly off-balance, fell into the cookie
dough. Net loss? Six cups of flour, four cups of sugar, three
sticks of butter.... Of course, it would have been cheaper to
remove the feline ingredient, pick out the hairs, and just rename
the recipe Paw Print Cookies.
On the second day of Christmas, my kitten accompanied me....
On a trip to the vet clinic. Who knew that skinny curling ribbon
has feline taste appeal? I didn't. Damages: $28 for the office
visit, $36 for anesthesia so the veterinarian could take $55
X-rays in case Sara had taste-tested any other Christmas
decorations, and a heck of a lot of embarrassment when the vet
removed the 3' curly *tail* in slightly less than two seconds by
tugging at it with a pair of tweezers.
On the first day of Christmas, my kitten ruined for me...
A batch of my special hand-print cookies. I had turned my back to
grab the cookie sheet sitting on the stove. In that micro-second,
Sara climbed onto the table, poked her paw into the delightfully
kneady mixture and, suddenly off-balance, fell into the cookie
dough. Net loss? Six cups of flour, four cups of sugar, three
sticks of butter.... Of course, it would have been cheaper to
remove the feline ingredient, pick out the hairs, and just rename
the recipe Paw Print Cookies.
On the second day of Christmas, my kitten accompanied me....
On a trip to the vet clinic. Who knew that skinny curling ribbon
has feline taste appeal? I didn't. Damages: $28 for the office
visit, $36 for anesthesia so the veterinarian could take $55
X-rays in case Sara had taste-tested any other Christmas
decorations, and a heck of a lot of embarrassment when the vet
removed the 3' curly *tail* in slightly less than two seconds by
tugging at it with a pair of tweezers.
Christmas Humor
Christmas Humor: "A Cat's Favorite Christmas Carols
10. Up on the Mousetop
9. Have Yourself a Furry Little Christmas
8. Joy to the Curled
7. I Saw Mommy Hiss at Santa Claus
6. The First Meow
5. Oh, Come All Ye Fishful
4. Silent Mice
3. Fluffy, the Snowman
2. Jingle Balls
1. Wreck the Halls!
Thanks to Daryl Hillen"
10. Up on the Mousetop
9. Have Yourself a Furry Little Christmas
8. Joy to the Curled
7. I Saw Mommy Hiss at Santa Claus
6. The First Meow
5. Oh, Come All Ye Fishful
4. Silent Mice
3. Fluffy, the Snowman
2. Jingle Balls
1. Wreck the Halls!
Thanks to Daryl Hillen"
Christmas Humor
Christmas Humor: "Carols For the Psychiatrically Challenged
SCHIZOPHRENIA: Do You Hear What I Hear?
MULTIPLE PERSONALITY DISORDER: We Three Kings Disoriented Are
DEMENTIA: I Think I'll Be Home For Christmas
NARCISSISTIC: Hark, the Herald Angels Sing About Me
MANIC: Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Busses and Trucks and Trees and Fire Hydrants and . . .
PARANOID: Santa Claus Is Coming To Get Me
PERSONALITY DISORDER: You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll Tell You Why
DEPRESSION: Silent Anhedonia, Holy Anhedonia, All Is Flat, All Is Lonely
OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE DISORDER: Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle"
SCHIZOPHRENIA: Do You Hear What I Hear?
MULTIPLE PERSONALITY DISORDER: We Three Kings Disoriented Are
DEMENTIA: I Think I'll Be Home For Christmas
NARCISSISTIC: Hark, the Herald Angels Sing About Me
MANIC: Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Busses and Trucks and Trees and Fire Hydrants and . . .
PARANOID: Santa Claus Is Coming To Get Me
PERSONALITY DISORDER: You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll Tell You Why
DEPRESSION: Silent Anhedonia, Holy Anhedonia, All Is Flat, All Is Lonely
OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE DISORDER: Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle"
A NASCAR Christmas
A NASCAR Christmas: "A NASCAR CHRISTMAS.....
Twas the Race before Christmas and all through the track
Each driver was ready to make his attack.
The tires had been stacked by the pit crew with care
With hopes none of them would run out of air.
The drivers were belted all snug in their seats
Where visions of checkered flags looked mighty sweet.
When out of the infield there rose such a clatter
The crowd sprang to their feet to see what was the matter.
What sight met their wondering eyes as they rose
Twas Rusty Wallace punching somebody's nose.
With eyes like the eagles the spotters they came
And they turned on their headsets and called them by name
'On Spencer! On Petty! On Rudd and Jarrett! 'On Cope! On Speed! On Ward and Jeff Burton! At the top of the curve ran 'em into the wall!
Now gentlemen, start your engines all!'
More rapid than lightning the Iceman they flew
With a sack full of cash and the Winston Cup too.
And then in a twinkling there came to the front
The bright rainbow colors of Gordon's DuPont.
Then Bobby Labonte flew by in a flash
While Martin had a breakdown and Spencer a crash.
Then all at once with a rush and a roar
There came a new car they had not seen before.
From bumper to bumper it was painted all red
North Pole Toy Co.was the sponsor they read.
Wi"
Twas the Race before Christmas and all through the track
Each driver was ready to make his attack.
The tires had been stacked by the pit crew with care
With hopes none of them would run out of air.
The drivers were belted all snug in their seats
Where visions of checkered flags looked mighty sweet.
When out of the infield there rose such a clatter
The crowd sprang to their feet to see what was the matter.
What sight met their wondering eyes as they rose
Twas Rusty Wallace punching somebody's nose.
With eyes like the eagles the spotters they came
And they turned on their headsets and called them by name
'On Spencer! On Petty! On Rudd and Jarrett! 'On Cope! On Speed! On Ward and Jeff Burton! At the top of the curve ran 'em into the wall!
Now gentlemen, start your engines all!'
More rapid than lightning the Iceman they flew
With a sack full of cash and the Winston Cup too.
And then in a twinkling there came to the front
The bright rainbow colors of Gordon's DuPont.
Then Bobby Labonte flew by in a flash
While Martin had a breakdown and Spencer a crash.
Then all at once with a rush and a roar
There came a new car they had not seen before.
From bumper to bumper it was painted all red
North Pole Toy Co.was the sponsor they read.
Wi"
Welcome!
I run across a lot of holiday stuff when I'm surfing, so I thought I'd put this blog together to share it.
Enjoy!
Enjoy!
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