On the third day of Christmas, my kitten wrecked for me...
13 ornaments on my Christmas tree. My mistake was forgetting to
chain the decorations to the branches. My other error was leaving
the room to go to the bathroom while Sara feigned sleeping under
the tree. How was I to know the kitten was actually measuring its
climbing potential? Value of broken bulbs? 7.50 plus tax.
On the fourth day of Christmas, my kitten broke for me...
A statue in my Lenox Nativity. Would you believe two Wise men
plus a head? Lenox nativity figurines: $55.99
On the fifth day of Christmas, my kitten scratched for me...
The kid across the street who collects for charity. It was an
accident. She merely wanted to reach out and touch someone.
Unfortunately, she used a unsheathed claw to do so. I settled
out-of-court for the cost of a jacket to replace the boy's blood
stained one and a hefty donation to the charity of their choice.
Although the amount must remain secret according to our
settlement, let me put it this way. You haven't seen many
soldiers for the Salvation Army this year, have you? Think: Major
Windfall!
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